Mzee and I just landed from San Diego this morning and drove straight to church to get baptized. Not that we sinned sana while on the trip , we’ve been planning this for months now.
It actually feels like a big deal to me. I was originally baptized Catholic as a child so going through today’s decision as an adult is a much deeper stronger experience. God has really brought me far and I am deeply enjoying my growing relationship with him.
I feel like a strange Christian though. I refuse to swallow wholesome the politics of a majority of Christians. I think that as a group we are some of the most dysfunctional family (Christians that is). From Ted Haggard, Jerry Falwell, and some of the nuts preaching in Kenya, I think that the name of God and Christ is so misused today. I used to be an active participant in the church a long time ago but I stopped because of Christians. I couldn’t deal with the hypocrisy.
Now I’m back and trying to focus exclusively on my relationship with God and to build my faith not based on the behaviour of Christians, but on God’s Word, and his speaking to my heart. And part of that is not being afraid to challenge and question and wrestle with God. Its taken me a long time to figure out that he can stand up for himself in my life. He can stand up to my toughest questions. And he lovingly answers even my most ridiculous challenges. So with that, Mzee and I took the plunge this morning. Committing ourselves publicly to walk the walk we have been walking for the last two years anyway.
In pregnancy news: I’ve been experiencing regular cramping for the last couple of days and i’m terrified this might be another miscarriage like last time. There is no bleeding which is reassuring and some of the literature I’ve been reading on the web seems to indicate that cramping sometimes happens in early pregnancy. I have a blood test tomorrow (Monday) to measure my HGC, cholesterol, diabetes etc and then another on Wednesday to check if my HGC (pregnancy hormones) are doubling every two days as they should in a healthy pregnancy. This was the test that revealed my impending miscarriage last time so I’m quite a bit anxious. Wish me/us luck.